BoneclawWalker



I landed a paid internship at one of the giant food companies today and I want anyone to be proud of me.

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Found out today I’m not my son’s father

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Why don't they listen until we're reduced to tears?

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  1. You don't owe anyone the insanely huge decision of bringing a child into the world.

  2. This is correct from a utilitarian perspective.

  3. Sorry in advance, this is gonna be a long comment because my NMom tried to drag me through this exact same situation when I was 16. And I know some things now that I wish I'd known back then.

  4. Tbf I'm more hurt that my dad who "was mine" wasn't there. I wouldn't care if I "wasn't" someone's kid, if they were a father to me, the language wouldn't matter. Actions speak louder than words

  5. Damn idk who you are but I love you and I love this. Hard boundaries. Idk what it is with ppl, they see a button, they want to push it, they see a line, they wanna cross it. They'll also play the long con game of slowly eroding boundaries. I love seeing someone who won't put up with that nonsense

  6. It was learned the hard way, repeatedly, by me being dumb and accepting too little, too late, and having my boundaries and standards for male behavior being WAY too low for WAY too long.

  7. Definitely google the topic of "toxic positivity" because it sounds like that's what he was doing.

  8. I don’t count corn on the cob as “corn on something “ because that’s just how corn comes, the cob is part of it. Corn as a side dish (with or without sauce) isn’t “on something” either, it’s just there. I never said Americans don’t eat corn, I said that they aren’t used to seeing whole corn on top of other dishes, something that I’ve seen quite a few times in other nations.

  9. Ah yes, now that I can agree with. I think part of the issue is that we eat too much corn syrup and processed sugar. I know it's weird but hear me out.

  10. Absolutely love this response and couldn't agree more. 6 different MH issues here and I would never expect anyone to tolerate my behaviour. If anything, I would over-apologise if i did act in such away it caused any inconvenience/distress to anyone else. I see too many people in life who use MH as an excuse for absolutely anything they are criticised for. Personal experience has told me that those people often don't even have a single official diagnosis and has formed an opinion in my head that these types of people are a large part of the reason MH problems still carry a stigma

  11. I have ADHD, Autism, Depression, PTSD and oh yeah a stage 4 terminal cancer, and I don't expect anyone to deal with my problems for me. If anything, I "quarantine" myself on days that I feel I might be high risk for a meltdown, because I don't want to risk taking things out on other people.

  12. Wow, your response was completely eye-opening, sorry I didn't answer it before now, I've been caught up in a lot of shit regarding my post. Thank you so much.

  13. No worries, I just hope you are able to come to a decision that satisfies you :)

  14. Go easy on the animal protein with UTI's and also go easy on processed sugars. If he likes blueberries, those are an excellent natural treatment for UTI's. Greens like spinach or kale or red cabbage shreds can also be good for the kidneys.

  15. He has a respiratory infection, not urinary tract! He’s pretty bony, which is why I’m worried! I have another rat who is about his size who isn’t bony. They are the same exact age. He doesn’t really want to play with the others, but he does like to explore when outside of the cage. He also enjoys climbing on me and my husband. He has periods of high activity and other times were he doesn’t do much. Sometimes he’s like significantly more active than my other rats. But he always just lays over if they try to interact with him. Could that be a dominance thing? Where he just doesn’t want to get in a fight?

  16. Sorry I have NO idea how I misread it as a UTI :( A chronic allergy or minor respiratory infection that just hangs on and on, could definitely keep him underweight and with little to no appetite. I've also seen mycoplasma make a rat chronically underweight. If he's in good condition but just small, he could just be a runt of the litter.

  17. Give them some peanut butter, yogurt, and banana, and see what they go crazy for. Then put that treat on your finger and hold it out to you. If they lean forward and sniff, if they take even one step towards you, reward them with the treat.

  18. I was trying a version of shoulder time initially with this “bonding scarf” I got on amazon but I stopped using it because it seemed to just stress them out and they just filled it with pee. Ill have to try just putting them on my shoulder instead and see if they have a better time with that.

  19. I have made a couple of those scarves and some rats love it and other rats seem to get stressed out by feeling kind of trapped in it and not being able to see everything going on around them.

  20. There is a product called liquid bandage or liquid skin, that you can paint onto an open wound to safely seal it. I use that on my animals whenever they open up a cut or injury. Seems to help keep it closed. I usually paint a few layers, letting it dry in between times. With rats I file down the nails on their hind feet to keep them from cutting themselves or bothering a surgical scar.

  21. I have a boy with a deformed toenail that occasionally rips off and bleeds, so I got something called "blood stop powder" that I dip his toe in and it instantly clots the blood and cleans the wound. I'm no vet but my guess would be he'd be fine with that, or some antibiotic ointment, and some painkillers.

  22. My boyfriend has the same issue so he wears a scarf when he's letting the rats have some shoulder time. We also wrapped some sandpaper around a brick and put it in front of their water bottle, so every time they drink they file down their claws a little bit. I have one rat that is patient enough, she will let me use a nail file on her claws. A couple strokes to each claw and she is "unsharpened" as we call it.

  23. If you socialize them starting as early as possible, absolutely. I have even raised litters of 100% wild rescued baby rats, and had them make decent pets. They had totally different personalities than a typical domestic rat, but they were friendly and safe to handle.

  24. You can trim it yourself but make sure you watch a couple videos and read up on the pros and cons of different methods. Also make sure you buy the right tool. Because the wrong tool/technique can cause a tooth to split vertically down into the root, and then there's even more tooth problems for the vet to deal with later.

  25. Put on a long sleeve shirt, then put a big loose hoodie or sweater on over it. Gently but firmly scoop up the scaredy rat and tuck him up inside the hoodie. Keep gentle pressure from your hands around him until he settles down a bit.

  26. Rats don't always recognize that body parts poked through the bars are actually attached to the rest of the human. It has no relationship to how they will react to another rat or to a hand that is going into the cage to pet them and offer treats.

  27. How common of an issue is this? I'll admit I've fed all my rats through the bars but I've never had a single one bite me for it. Am I just lucky? (I've had 8 rats over ~4 years)

  28. I have had no real bites through bars, but a lot of curious "test nibbles" trying to figure out what my finger was and if it's food or attached to me.

  29. I have two new rats that I'm introducing to the pack. The two separate cages are currently next to eachother as they get used to eachother's scent and presence, but far enough apart so that injuries don't occur.

  30. my rats do that when there is something they want that they can't reach. Maybe she just wants to meet the baby and is frustrated that she can't get closer

  31. We always handle our babies a lot even before their eyes are open. They grow up very calm and comfortable around humans and it doesn't take them long to adjust to a new person. I wonder if maybe your breeder didn't start handling them as newborns.

  32. Yeah she should be fine, might just need the minerals. You could try offering her vitamin drops or little pieces of chewable gummy vitamins.

  33. that... that looks like it could be a domestic rat gone feral... looks like a fawn or maybe fawn hoodie...I wonder what its story is. Brave lil beastie for sure.

  34. ohmigawd well for starters they are much cuter! My norway rats paws are longer fingers, but narrower, more obvious bony joints, big long claws. Your rats paws look much more like little monkey hands. And your roof rat's "thumb" is also longer.

  35. Keep her warm, maybe in a fleece cloth on your lap if she'll let you hold her.

  36. I'll second the hydraulic injection injury warning. Hydraulic injection injuries can be expected to be permanently disfiguring.

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