1. You are great at coming up with ideas for fun time

  2. I left my laptop at work once and had to do a 6 hour round trip after a 3 hour journey. That was nice.

  3. Yeah, I think I’d have just left that until the next day.

  4. not gonna lie, that is SO cool. (we're talking about the 'Chicken' right?) whered ya get it?

  5. musn' taking over........

  6. Go on...just click know you want to...just a little click...go on...I black dare you...

  7. You know what you should do? You should apply for jobs to work with animals. Take it by the horns homeslice, the world is yours.

  8. I love wildlife but daddy long legs are lanky bouncy twats. I'd grab him round the neck and tell him, very clearly, to fuck off.

  9. People always forget this is the intro to devil woman

  10. I'm 39 and I only feel comfortable if I have one square of kitchen roll neatly folded in my pocket at all times.

  11. 19 minutes to cool, then smoosh 12 into my waiting globular orifice in the remaining 6 minutes.

  12. I’m 25 and I feel old. People are clubbing and their DoB starts with 20XX

  13. I desperately wanna go to a techno rave but middle aged and old so no one I know wants to go with me. Might go on my own and be the old weirdo cutting shapes in his own world.

  14. A few weeks ago, your mum rang me (again). I'd tried to distance myself from her but she was relentless, so I answered.

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