1. So, this is my perspective as someone whose had a lot of experience dating (usually men) who are older than me, including when I was quite young.

  2. I think saying, "they just have a regular job, not a career" is pretty firmly in the "insensitive" category. I don't know how you're differentiating this for others.

  3. Yeah I get you. I’m aware of all the stories. I’m not trying to make some stupid statement or something. Also I case your curious I’m 18 and I bought the shirt a couple months ago.

  4. well this is the thing: you aren't trying to make a statement, but your choice of clothing logo is making a statement about you. Regardless of whether it's offensive or not-- is that a brand you want people to associate you with, and if so, why?

  5. There’s nothing about the brand really, I just thought the shirt looked really cool. I was in tj maxx and came across that shirt so I bought it. And to be honest, I wasn’t really thinking what other people would think when I bought it

  6. IDK, and to be honest, I'm not sure it matters either way? Like, what would the proposed "solution" be? You can't make people get into relationships, their reason for not wanting to be in one is kind of immaterial, because violating their agency to get them into one is inherently unjust.

  7. You think pastry chefs, chefs, psychologists and counselors, and historians "don't make money"? Like... those are all professions. Depending on what level you work at, you can earn from minimum wage up to like, celebrity levels of money. I don't necessarily recommend pursuing a hobby as a career, but I do think your perception of doing those things as a job is more than a little out of whack.

  8. I don’t think it’s really me wanting to pursue a hobby as a career but more so it’s really hard to find that middle ground and I just feel really lost at work in general. I don’t really have anyone in my life (friends, family, mentors, etc) so it’s difficult to know what I’m doing and also have a life outside of work

  9. Well, I would recommend trying to make some friends, either at work or outside of work.

  10. Hmm I’m not sure if that’s the association. I just think that Europeans are much more into being well-dressed and it being a sign of respect towards others (this transcends class or finances IMO).

  11. Girl that is what classism is as a textbook definition. It's not about being European.

  12. I don't know, I'm not OPs husband, which is why I suggested she talk to him about why he's holding onto and wearing shoes for dress occasions that no longer look dressy. There could be a multitude of reasons, including that he's just clueless.

  13. I guess but I never really thought he was all that great of an artist to begin with, so seems a little weird to be hanging on to him despite his well documented bad behavior.

  14. It depends on what's going on. There are a couple of companies that make PMS and menstrual symptom-reducing vitamins (Flo is one), and they contain fairly standard ingredients like chasteberry and rosehips, which traditionally have been used to lessen the severity of things like bloating and cramping.

  15. Arundati roy’s books would be amazing if she weren’t so cringe.

  16. It's a work of fiction but I really enjoyed Arundati Roy's "The Ministry of Utmost Happiness," which features a hijra (a 3rd gender category in India) main character and the community and family she lives with.

  17. That would be a good idea for when I am older (I am a 18 year old without a job) but I still feel frustrated that awareness campaigns that talk about male victims get so little attention compared to woman victims

  18. I feel like your age won't be a barrier to volunteering. I've known lots of young people that volunteer.

  19. I am a 18 year old without a job so i can't really do that but I don't understand why abuse awareness campaign don't include male victim along side woman victim (I deleted my first reply because I accidentally sent it unfinished)

  20. I've always wanted to explain it that way, but I know it doesn't tend to go over well on Reddit. I'm not sure how my friends would feel if they are similar to Reddit's feelings.

  21. You know you don't actually owe anyone an explanation for your relationship style or sexuality, right?

  22. Don't do your activism/learning about social justice or civil rights primarily on tiktok.

  23. I completely understand the need for nuance and sensitivity in approaching these issues. But do you think it is an “assumption” that they are powerless/voiceless. We know for a fact that there are authoritarian regimes around the world that subjugates women. We also understand very well how fear/internalized misogyny/lack of education and financial freedom etc can affect one’s ability to stand up for their rights.

  24. I think this is a perspective difference-- someone being oppressed is not the same as them lacking power/voice. When we "step in" we are reinforcing disempowerment.

  25. In the situation that they do want some kind of support from us, what would be the best approach/forum to let the world know?

  26. I think the thing to do is to donate to local organizations and feminist leaders, to share and signal boost content from Iranian women and civil rights activists about what they want, and to build relationships with Iranians-- both those living inside and outside of Iran, so you have more cultural awareness and proximity to help.

  27. “Women also make up a minority of military personnel in almost all countries.” So that is the point I was making. Not sure why you want to argue it.

  28. Women make up a minority of personnel in these professions because they were historically, and sometimes presently, discriminated against in terms of recruitment and hiring, if they weren't or aren't outright banned from participating at all.

  29. “Women make up a minority of personnel in these professions because they were historically, and sometimes presently, discriminated against in terms of recruitment and hiring“

  30. Please read the studies. Women also face a wealth gap, which does matter quite a lot when it comes to retirement and end-of-life quality.

  31. Well yes I agree with that! But my question was is sexism strictly institutional and systematic as opposed to individual prejudice?

  32. I'm confused as to how sexism is defined, I know how it is in our society and I'm aware that I institutional l sexism hurts women more than men, but is sexism strictly institutional, or is anyone hating anyone else due to their sex considered sexism

  33. Sexism has a colloquial aka general definition, which is prejudice against someone on the basis of their sex.

  34. Not insensitive at all!! I’m debating doing this on my 39th birthday if I haven’t met someone yet. I was thinking this may just give me a bit of peace of mind in the interim?

  35. I dunno, from what I know of it, going through the process to freeze your eggs is kind of intense-- you do hormone therapy and the procedure itself is fairly invasive.

  36. That’s true, so you think I’ll possibly still be able to meet someone if I rather do IVF at 39 rather than put myself through egg freezing and maybe then still IVF?

  37. I think if you're committed to being a parent and have the means to do it solo, you should, and if you meet someone and want to have another child with them, you can do so at that time.

  38. I'd break up with him for sure and then maybe consider letting her know he'd been sleeping with me on the side, but like... probably she knows already he was still involved with you to some extent if they met while you were on a break, were dating when you went through a break up with him, etc.

  39. That’s a good idea. I just feel a bit underhand but he was more underhand than me.

  40. I mean in the future I definitely don't recommend engaging in any kind of scheme like this to "catch" someone cheating; you can just break up with people, basically for any reason. It would've been enough for me to see the app notification-- if you all agreed to get off the apps, but he didn't, that's enough.

  41. I think I would've showed up to the fake profile girl date and broken up with him then.

  42. I think when other people behave badly, it's really important to reframe the questions you ask yourself, "why would he date me for three months only to ghost me after we slept together? Is that all he wanted the whole time? What's wrong with him, that he would lead me on for that long just for sex one time?"

  43. In my country he's SO DAMN POPULAR. It's like 2016 all over again.

  44. I am engaged with almost every popular subject on the internet, JP is one of the many ones I keep an eye on, I ask these questions to feminists since they're the only group I think will be interested in answering the questions like me.

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