what should women be allowed to do without being judged?

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  1. ^ This. If both parties are incredibly inebriated, nobody could consent and this isn’t a clear cut case of SA. But if he was sober, or mostly sober, and aware of what had happened, then unfortunately that isn’t the case. If she woke up in his car, there’s an implication that he drove her somewhere… which is problematic on either end. Either he was too drunk to drive, or sober enough to know she couldn’t consent.

  2. Uh yeah no this is not a good defense. If he was drunk too, and drove his car and killed someone, he’d be responsible for killing someone. If he was drunk and pinned down and raped a girl in his car, he’s still responsible. It’s kind of ridiculous to say he gets a pass because he was drunk, even though he was on top of her.

  3. The important word in your comment is 'IF'....if both of them were blacked out then nobody knows how it all went down. Also she did not say she was out is where you have a gap in your memory and come to at a certain point. I've had many times where I was really drunk and blacked out and had no memory of long periods even though I was with other people and they said I was drunk but still conversing and acting normally. It happens

  4. She says she blacked out in between drinking and throwing up in the bathroom (which btw if a woman is at the point of puking from alcohol, she’s too drunk to consent). She then says she fell asleep and woke up to him on top of her. And she lied there motionless til he was done. That’s pretty clear cut

  5. You are wrong because you are not more likely to be raped wearing revealing clothes. I’ve been harassed way more times wearing a winter coat than shorts and a tank top. You would benefit from looking through this

  6. You know it helps to see if your studies were

  7. When you say you can’t feel it, what do you mean by that? Like you don’t physically feel anything, or you just aren’t feeling into it?

  8. Like not into it? But I'm also not not into it? It's hard to explain. Like I know he's in me, but it doesn't feel particularly good? But it's not bad either?

  9. Is there foreplay or are you guys just jumping into it? Do you feel any kind of discomfort?

  10. Yeah that’s pretty weird. I think the only reasons I can think of that wouldn’t be malicious is that one of them was sleepwalking, or one of them was looking for her roommates and got spooked that they went into the wrong bedroom. If it was the latter I don’t see why they couldn’t just say it was a mistake though, it’s pretty forgivable.

  11. But it means the other health scares WERE false alarms--- because she hasn't been hospitalized before and the OOP has no medical training and didn't intervene. So I don't see why this makes the OOP a devil.

  12. She was diagnosed with hypertension, anemia, and she’s underweight. That’s a very high-risk pregnancy. Also the pregnancy was planned by both of them, so she has to be home sick while he gets to party with friends? She’s making the baby, the least he can do is be by her side because it’s made her so sick. He’s not going to be able to party with friends when he has a newborn at home either.

  13. A lot of young women, myself included, start getting hit on/cat called/male attention during puberty, ~ 10-13. This translates into “You are so mature for your age!” or “You developed into quite the woman now!”. They were lying to you.

  14. You are 18, and I know you probably don’t quite feel like an adult yet, you are and you’re allowed to go on trips with other people by yourself. You don’t need your dads permission. It’s honestly even more gross that your dad doesn’t even allow you to hang out with your mom.

  15. Call the National Domestic Violence Hotline at 1-800-799-7233. (I can help find another hotline for you if you are not in the US)

  16. Most popular dramas have characters that are morally grey. They do good things and bad things because that’s how most humans act. No one is all pure or all bad. If you can’t handle watching a show in which the protagonist has flaws like this, don’t watch them. The reason she probably justifies this behavior is because the sins committed against the protagonist are so much worse than the sin of having an affair.

  17. You should still clarify. There’s a good chance she could like you, so if you don’t like her be clear so she doesn’t feel led on.

  18. Wow I'm just tired of people shitting on younger people. First off those that turn 18 a lot are in college sometimes out of state which makes voting difficult. Let's not be delusional that we've done anything to make this easier for them, especially certain states. Totally anecdotal but I know of two college students that voted by mail in the primary that ended up having to jump through all sorts of hoops to cure their ballot because they were denied based upon signature.

  19. As a young person, you’re correct. There’s a world of difference between what elections look like for different people. My first election that I was out of state for was an utter nightmare. Ballot requests could only be faxed or mailed, (I had like $6 to my name so I wrestled with buying postage for it) so I spent awhile looking for the last fax machine on campus. Then I had to get it notarized, and the notary said I had to use a blacker pen. Signature didn’t look like the one on my license, had to suck up and pay a shit ton of postage when I finally mailed my ballot.

  20. You had to get your ballot request notarized??? What the actual fuck!

  21. Honestly I’ve never heard of this, but usually those smells are pretty strong to everyone. Like I know a lot of people without ADHD who get sick when someone else is wearing perfume. Lavender is also a very strong smell, most people I know can smell lavender plants from yards away.

  22. The lengths that schools will go to to reprimand girls for the most innocuous things while they ignore male students committing crimes is insane to me.

  23. I can one-up you. Someone who was in my friend group threatened to stab me over some weird love triangle quarrel. Another one of my friends told me and after confirming it wasn’t just a terrible joke, I called my parents and they called the police. There was an investigation, the knife was found discarded in a yard near the school. And I wasn’t allowed to go to school for a week for my safety. But that boy who threatened to stab me and had literal evidence against him was still allowed to go. Still baffles me to this day.

  24. That reminds me, when my brother was in 7th grade he watched two 14 year old classmates get arrested on school grounds. The night before, these two boys stabbed a woman 50 times at a car wash before chucking her body in the backseat and stealing her car. This being the same middle school where girls would have to bend over in front of the male principal so he could see if their shorts were too short 🤮

  25. My dad has been an anti-vaxxer his whole life so when Covid came I knew shit was gonna get wild. I just wasn’t expecting the other conspiracies to follow: he was weirdly fixated on Michelle Obama having a penis for a couple weeks and it was so pathetic lol.

  26. There are no accredited online programs for Landscape Architecture. It’s a very hands-on type of education that online can’t cut it for. I’m sure there’s tons of online programs for Ecology, but it’s going to be a lot more science and very little design.

  27. You broke up with her. She has no obligation to tell you the truth. This post is so weird, you act like you don’t want anything to do with her and then by the end you think she’s cheating on you? Decide, you can’t have it both ways.

  28. Look I’m also very introverted so I get it. But I also date an extrovert and he of course sees his friends when I’m away working or visiting family. I can’t keep my boyfriend house-bound, that’s not how relationships work.

  29. She was drinking and driving. That’s what I’m struggling with. When we met I was super apprehensive about dating her. She partied 4 times a week and always drove. So she probably drove tipsy every time but sometimes drove drunk. Like almost definitely driving above .08 regularly.

  30. Okay well your priorities are all over the place because that’s a way bigger issue than her going out while you’re out. Such a way bigger issue.

  31. I-80 is probably your preferred route. I-70 through Colorado in winter is going to mean ski traffic and tougher driving in general. I also will choose driving through Nebraska over Kansas every single time, it’s basically the same but way more bearable. Denver to KC will be the longest 10 hours of your life.

  32. Stop doing things for him. If he doesn’t want to do the chores that take 10 minutes to do tops, he can cook and clean his own shit. Stop buying food for him at the grocery store, stop cooking for him, don’t do his laundry, if he has any of his stuff laying around, pile it up and leave it somewhere.

  33. girl…do we have the same boyfriend because mine does the exact same thing 💀. it’s like he’ll get upset if I don’t have my shoes on yet, (which takes 30 seconds) then as soon as I have my shoes and coat on with my hand on the door, he goes to the bathroom.

  34. Cost of living doesn’t factor into ticket prices as much as the team being good does. Chiefs tickets are $200 minimum, and that’s a midwest team.

  35. You guys were dating for three weeks, unless you specifically talked about it you most likely weren’t exclusive. I highly doubt you were “fulfilling all her needs” in only three weeks.

  36. The entire problem with your relationship is in the very first line of your post.

  37. Why don’t you just go and take the test? It’s not like you can’t take it again if you failed. I think you know a lot more about driving then you think you do, you’ve had lots of lessons.

  38. Honestly I’m a bit of a perfectionist and don’t like the idea of taking it again without practicing again. But I’ll ask him or my mom for the money for the test (our car doesn’t meet testing standards so I’d have to pay $180 for the local school to let me use one of their cars). I don’t like failing because failing means money down the drain for me.

  39. It is easier then you think it is, I promise. I passed my drivers test on my first try even though I rolled through a stop sign and bombed the parallel parking section. It’s not a letter grade, you can shoot for a 70% and pass. You can do this.

  40. What is the problem? You want her attention on you but you don’t want to spend all of your attention on her?

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