1. It took four or five sessions for us, using the MID. That therapist ended up not being good for us for long-term therapy, but at least we got a diagnosis so we don't have to start from square one when we find a new one someday. On a broader level, it was about four months between first suspecting DID/OSDD and getting diagnosed, due to unavailability of specialists, and around twelve years of off and on therapy that was generally unhelpful before finally getting diagnosed. (The latter is what is generally meant when you hear something like "it takes the average person with DID ten years to be diagnosed"; it's not ten years of seeing a single specialist before they form a conclusion, it's ten years of "being in the mental health system" bouncing around multiple therapists and psychiatrists and seeing little improvement before someone trained in dissociative disorders notices that they might have DID/OSDD and gives them a test. The person who has it typically doesn't know, either, or at least, the host doesn't, so they're not looking for specialists. Someone who strongly suspects that they have DID/OSDD and is actively seeking a specialist can usually get an examination much sooner.)

  2. Thanks for sharing your experience. I’m not too worried about getting a diagnosis, at this point I’m just confused about which therapy to do next since I’ve been in treatment for nearly 20 years and I have other issues that need long term treatment so it’s a choice of what to focus on first. I’ve never done trauma therapy though and I’m a bit overwhelmed trying to navigate all the different options. Unfortunately due to long waiting lists I seem to just be stuck in some sort of limbo while I have to keep meeting therapists that may not work out. But I’d prefer to find someone that’s a good fit. I think the challenge for me is finding someone that has the most relevant training for my most pressing issues.

  3. I did two sessions with specialists who were able to diagnose me. They each lasted 1-3 hours. There are screening questionnaires like the DES that people use to help understand what category you fall into.

  4. Live in a city in an apartment in an isolated bubble. I’ve gotten too good at isolating. I like being fairly anonymous.

  5. Therapy is too expensive and painful. But having kids sounds fun.

  6. Will generate you money if you have no net worth so there's that S/

  7. I can’t think of a workbook but have you tried behavioural activation? I don’t like most CBT but it’s one thing I actually found helpful. Sometimes writing out a schedule helps me to keep up the momentum of getting things done. Even scheduling small slots of time. I find it easiest to get started with small tasks and reward myself for them.

  8. I've also found that scheduling helps to pull me off of Freeze. But I inevitably start procrastinating it, and eventually drop it.

  9. Same for me. It’s hard to keep up the momentum for a full day. I’m happy enough some days when I can do a few hours of activity. Better than a complete stop I guess.

  10. I’ve had these sorts of experiences of vivid dreams on antidepressants in the past. I go through periods now where they don’t happen often. For me they seem to be more common when I’m under a lot of stress.

  11. Definitely sounds DA. If they truly are a lone wolf schizoid personality traits are a possibility. Fear of intimacy and commitment is a key symptom.

  12. Oh, wow. I never heard about that before and man, does he display a ton of those personality traits. Thank you, this is very enlightening.

  13. No worries. I have a schizoid adaptation and I relate heaps to what you wrote. Especially your saying he lives as a hermit. It’s more than just extreme introversion, unless we’re good at wearing a mask socially we tend to come across as very quiet and a bit odd.

  14. I’m fearful avoidant leaning avoidant. I’m good at remembering and asking people about the little things going on for them. Buying thoughtful gifts. Planning/organising fun things to do together. Staying with friends after surgery or visiting them in hospital. I will open up and be vulnerable with people I trust enough and want to be closer to. I’m loyal and forgiving of the people I want in my life.

  15. I have a work from home job now and thought that would make a big difference. I definitely prefer it to my past career working in busy offices but I still struggle with being overwhelmed. I think anything I do more than part time would probably be too consuming.

  16. I’m sorry to hear you’re going through a challenging time. It sounds like you’ve been through so much.

  17. I’ve been thinking about getting a new therapist for a while now, but I feel so stuck..

  18. I’ve been in this place and it was actually a very retraumatising experience that shouldn’t have happened. I’m not sharing this to tell you what to do. I just regret staying and fawning and worrying about their feelings more than what was best for me. Ending therapy can be challenging so I get it.

  19. Ugh this pisses me off so much. I’m sorry you had to experience that bullshit. It’s annoying when therapists make assumptions like that. Sounds pretty manipulative and invalidating.

  20. Sorry to hear you’re going through that. I can relate to using anger to keep people at a distance.

  21. Not sure what to call it but I still have this issue at age 30. I don't do well with authority like people.. Bosses, police, even doctor's and therapists. My therapist triggered me really bad last month and I am still too scared to speak up about it because it's as if I'm telling her she is doing her job wrong,(what she did was wrong) so I'm worried it will make her mad. I never want to upset anyone or make them mad, because it does exactly this to me. It makes me revert back to a child like state and I need to hide and cry. And it could over the smallest thing that normal people could shrug off like nothing.

  22. I understand how hard this is, it’s stressful giving feedback to authority figures. I wish I told my last therapist earlier about something that triggered me really badly. Personally I would rather find out sooner than later if they’re someone that can’t handle feedback. They’re there to support you and if they can’t cope with gentle feedback they can’t help you.

  23. Yes I’m hesitant to go back to a coffee shop where they know my name (and pronounce it wrong). I hate telling people when they pronounce my name wrong. I usually prefer not to be recognised.

  24. I found this explanation in quora, hope it helps.

  25. Thanks for commenting. That Quora article explains regression well.

  26. A depression isn’t usually apathetic. A depressive person cares a lot about some things, enough to feel bad when they don’t work out and enough to struggle with life or commit suicide.

  27. Yeah I think I need to try reading it again when I’m not jet lagged. It’s a bit surreal right now reading about dreams of babies in drawers etc

  28. I still struggle with this too. If it feels like my friends aren’t putting in as much effort as me I feel the urge to avoid them. Then I end up alone. Don’t know how to fight this when I have a strong urge to avoid them.

  29. While I agree with this statement I’ve noticed that a lot of people that say this are people who are passive aggressive and invalidate others frequently then blame them for reacting. If they say something sarcastic to be passive aggressive instead of being direct about what’s bothering them then that’s just manipulative and avoiding responsibility. I’d prefer people were just honest with me.

  30. Why would I want to live longer? My grandmothers lived until late 90s. It doesn’t look enjoyable to live to that age unless you’ve got a good quality of life.

  31. Feels like the pandemic has really changed how people feel. It might be awhile before we return to normal to some degree. Masks seem to have an effect on people less civil and short-tempered and impatient as well.

  32. Have you noticed people are more rude and angry where you’re from during the pandemic? I couldn’t decide if I was just noticing it more because I’ve been stressed but I was travelling in Europe and it was so obviously different to previous trips that I couldn’t come to any other conclusion. I’m guessing people’s pandemic stress is coming out as aggression?

  33. I think its the masks as well, people depersonalizing others treating them like they are not people. I've had people in stores just walk into me or make me get out of the way. It's really weird. Not seeing a face, at least the mouth, and that dehumanizing takes place. It's not conscious, I'm sure.

  34. I hadn’t thought of that. It makes sense that it’s harder to feel empathy for others if the masks are dehumanizing. I thought a holiday would have helped my mental health but if anything it just woke me up to the fact that the world is pretty fucked right now.

  35. It’s scary when strong feelings do happen. It almost feels out of control for me. Sometimes good out of control, sometimes scary.

  36. I had a thought pop into my mind when I read this, hope you don’t mind me sharing it. I had the thought I wonder if maybe he’s using being unhappy with his appearance as a reason to unconsciously avoid/put off dating again? Just a thought. I think I do that.

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