1. i don't find it offensive when people talk about their struggles from being an autistic in an allistic society because we all know its really hard, but i do find it offensive/upsetting when people blame their struggles on being autistic itself and wish for a cure. it's not like i'm mad at people for feeling that way because we all have to go through that phase of healing at some point but it can be upsetting to hear and often feels like a personal attack, which is probably why some autistic people get upset even if you're just trying to express yourself.

  2. I believe in reclaiming slurs. If shits been used to target people like me, I’m going to say it.

  3. it's not reclaiming if you're using it against other people. reclaiming is when you take a slur and make it positive or empowering. the connotation of the word hasn't changed at all and you know it because you use it. i used to have the same viewpoint as you before i realised how stupid it was but i used the word within my own circle of friends who i knew were okay with it, not in public comments where i could potentially hurt people. grow up pls (not an attack towards OP, thank you for the polite response!!)

  4. I am very curious if when you got diagnosed you had the "male autism diagnosis" as it displays differently for men and women or boys and girls. but you did say you relate more to the women than men bit then again back then you were 8 so they must've seen the male autism aspects right? I hope this doesn't sound weird

  5. this comment is confusing to me, what do you mean by a male autism diagnosis? i'm a ciswoman and i was diagnosed at around the same age as OP. yes men are more likely to be diagnosed than women, but the reason for that is sexism & male privilege. there aren't any real differences between male & female autism, it presents differently in everyone regardless of gender, it's just overlooked & invalidated more in women.

  6. you could've gone for anything else but you went for something that you know a lot of women are often shamed for. your beer belly isn't natural, our stretch marks are. i'm not sure why you put quotations around "natural" and "your kids", she's spot on lol. YTA

  7. My mistake, if only I had known you were the voice of all families with an autistic child. How inclusive of you.

  8. your voice literally does not matter in this space unless you are autistic, please leave

  9. Leave the parent group? Out of interest, do you think your child being bullied at school because of their stiming isn't stressful? Do you think them finding fitting in so hard that they tell you they wish they were dead might be stressful? Do you want me to list the many, many reasons caring for a child with autism creates stress to help you understand why there might be 'parent' groups in the first place? Please don't consider yourself the voice of autistic children because you certainly aren't the voice of mine.

  10. nobody asked, this isn't a parent group and you're not welcome here. don't you think it's time to self evaluate if literally not even one autistic person in this comment section has agreed with you? it's disgusting that you think you have the right to invade our spaces, break the rules and then talk over us JUST because your daughter is autistic. we are more knowledgeable on this topic than you or any other parent and we are the people you should be listening to. look at the downvotes and all of the comments disagreeing with you and realise that you are wrong, for your daughters sake. i won't be replying again

  11. ...i'm kind of confused about the question that's being asked but i'm assuming you mean is it misogynistic to end a friendship with a woman you have romantic feelings for? if that's what you mean then no, if you have feelings for someone of any gender it's always going to be hard to have a platonic relationship with them. i've had to cut plenty of men & women off because i had feelings for them that weren't reciprocated. it'd be weirder to continue the friendship with them in my opinion, i wouldn't want to be friends with someone who was only interested in a romantic relationship with me and i've had men pretend to be friends with me only to reveal they wanted to date me or sleep with me after a while and that was really upsetting for me. the best thing you can do for the both of you is cut her out of your life

  12. yeah that's what im asking essentially! I agree i also feel like it's hard to have platonic relationships with someone i have crush on but also i read here that its bad to only view women as romantic interest and then complain about getting friendzoned or whatever.

  13. honestly i can't see what's wrong with this unless there's missing context so i think people are just misunderstanding your question because of the way its worded. it would become misogynistic if you literally only saw her/women in general as romantic or sexual interests and didn't view them as people outside of that but i don't think that's what you're saying. refusing to be friends with any woman because you only view them as romantic interests for you is misogynistic, but ending a friendship with one woman because you have unreciprocated feelings for them is just setting boundaries

  14. nta but please stop calling autistic people high functioning / low functioning, it’s inaccurate and rude

  15. So I promise I'm not trying to be rude or anything I'd just genuinely like to learn because I've only ever heard the terms high functioning and low functioning being used so it's normal to me, but when did it become considered rude and are there other terms that fit better that I can start to use?

  16. yeah! i'm not anywhere near FL unfortunately and i see people have already given some great answers but i recommend joining

  17. your post history is ridiculous i pray to god that you're trolling

  18. i agree w others that it could be anxiety, but i still recommend working with a doctor to rule out all other possible causes before writing it off as anxiety! if your son doesn't go to the toilet often i think constipation/irregular bowel movements are probably the most common cause and can be more common in autistic people because sensory issues often affect our diet and how much fruit/vegetables we're able to eat. that was the case for me, i had stomach pain so bad that i cried too. i do still have stomach issues sometimes but it's better now that i'm older and have improved my diet over time. if this is the case for your son too there are definitely things you can do to help/possibly medications that can help also, id definitely discuss it with your doctor

  19. Well, the main idea was to share some thoughts I have been having and listen to your response and take each other seriously for a *second* to think, that maybe we could look at things differently. But I see that people are very much triggered by them and now I have been labeled an old black dude so nvm.

  20. why do you keep saying old "black" dude? i haven't seen anyone mention race except you

  21. I’m autistic and have OCD. Just thinking aloud here- do you think treating trauma or OCD related things with exposure therapy could help? or maybe not, because it would still be interpreted through an autistic perspective/ my brain? I almost did exposure therapy for something years ago but it’s also terrified me.

  22. it can definitely be helpful for confronting ocd and trauma related fears (of course you should be working with an ocd / trauma informed therapist and having talking therapy alongside). it doesn't work for autistic burnout or sensory issues because those things aren't phobia/fear related

  23. yes you're a huge asshole. also- stop calling autistic people high functioning

  24. i'm very facially expressive too! can't hide anything lol, if i'm upset or angry it immediately shows on my face even if i don't want it to. i am uncomfortable with eye contact but i can still maintain it pretty well in most circumstances :)

  25. they want us to either give up our entire lives or to give up sex (or to just never go outside in case we get raped i guess), that's pretty controlling and the excuse of wanting to "save babies" (a clump of cells) just doesn't hold up when you're also conservative, anti vax, pro gun, pro adoption, homophobic, sexist, racist, ableist and every other ist, which these people often are

  26. i think it's due to a drop in dopamine like another commenter said, sometimes when you get past the initial excitement of getting something it can feel underwhelming/depressing. i experience this too! i felt the same way after getting my switch but i did end up having a lot of fun with it eventually :)

  27. possibly scoliosis? pretty common! it's often mild and causes little to no pain, ribs protruding is a common sign, along with a visibly curved spine outline, pertruding or uneven shoulder blades etc.. this is just a guess, i do recommend seeking a professional opinion if you're concerned

  28. learn how to communicate in a healthy way. i've never had a reaction like this to genuine & healthy vulnerability, i've spent the majority of my relationships with men actively encouraging them to open up with me and trying to help them feel comfortable doing that. if you're ever actually in a situation where someone has a negative reaction to your vulnerability, nine times out of ten there'll be a reason and it's not internalised misogyny, it's probably just you

  29. not a lot of people fake autism for attention, i think that's such a damaging misconception for this exact reason, it makes people feel guilty or doubt themselves. those that do "fake" tend to move on very quickly once they realise how badly autistic people are treated for being autistic. it's just a trend to fakeclaim people with autism rn, neurotypicals can't stand it being talked about in a positive light lol. yes it's okay to self diagnose autism! fuck anyone that says it's not

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