What did you not know about sex until you lost your virginity?

  1. Just because you’re having sex doesn’t mean you’ll become good at it without a remarkable amount of trial and error.

  2. Penises can move on their own! Well, be moved by their owner without hands, that shocked me that they can make em bounce

  3. If a persons heart rate is high enough while sporting an erection, their penis will pulse (move) along with their heart beat.

  4. Instead of just after virginity, after years of having sex and looking back at my first time where my partner was much more experienced than me, I’ve realised that pretty much all sex with a new person, virginity or not, feels new. I was really hung up on being good at it when I should’ve treated it as a learning experience for the next time.

  5. This is awesome! Everybody is a new body. Everyone we experience is a new experience. Every step on the journey leads to a new vista.

  6. That foreplay is SUPER important. You don't see it too much in a lot of porn so until you get into the bedroom you don't really consider the prep. Often times you just see people going at it which is great and all but everything is much better when both parties are warmed up

  7. Porn is a terrible guide for virgins. You are unlikely to be coordinated enough or understand your partner's body well enough to do any of that weird shit.

  8. Not to mention porn is designed to be viewer friendly. Good sex doesn't necessarily look like that because you don't need to make sure the camera has a good view.

  9. Yeah like I knew it’d be warm, but not “toasty”. My very first time penetrating, I remember muttering “oh fuck” under my breath and instantly came.

  10. Omg. I would LOVE to figure out something, other than wiping up with a towel, some WAY to clean up gracefully without a condom. I’d be rich. And it pissed me off when people finish in a movie and roll over.

  11. Same. Friends would talk about having sex multiple times a day, and I was over here wondering WHY they would ever put themselves through that. It took days to recover. Someone finally mentioned a latex allergy, and it all made sense.

  12. To quote an ex when I asked her this: "I knew what was going to happen.... but I didn't know what was going to happen." Basically there's no better teacher than experience.

  13. But ironically not that many calories are burned, according to studies!! then again, how do you differentiate between perhaps a 10 minute quickie, a 40 minute sex session, and a full day of edging each other?Hmm

  14. And if you get a cramp it's better to own it and be honest with a quick minute break than to power through it or enter a new crazy position that makes no sense at all and leaves your partner wondering where the fuck you learnt this from.

  15. The vagina is lower than expected, I assumed it started at the same place as a penis, and with my first gf I slipped a hand down her trousers and thought she was some weird barbie doll human with a smooth patch instead of genitals

  16. Then you should know how confused i was when i really looked at my own vagina as a kid… i thought it was too far away

  17. Long time ago, wife and I (younger days) had just finished a rather vigorous coupling, she went to sit up on her elbows and “FLLUURP” - a little moist queef escaped. She was mortified and I don’t know why but I just yelled “Hey! We won a prize!” Which set her off giggling, punctuated by a string of little queefs - flurp flurp flurp flurp flurp flurp.. We were just howling with laughter! Omg, I’m laughing now just thinking about it.

  18. This is hilarious because (yes i had sex at a young age sadly) when i got with a man i always thought the penis came out the bottom of the crotch. Like it hung there where our vulva is. I was shocked to figure it just stuck out where the pelvis is. I also thought sex was impossible unless it was really long because if the vagina and the penis are so far down how else can you have sex other than bumping on opposite sides. Missionary and such just never made sense.

  19. Best tip I can give is learning to put the majority of your weight on your knees, you don't need them up in the air while on top.

  20. Lol our dogs do the same. It’s like you have your own private audience if you get caught up in the moment and forget to kick them out

  21. So my grandparents got our dog back when our landlord decided they didn’t like pets in the house anymore. Apparently the dog eventually adopted a habit of barking to break them up whenever they were fighting.

  22. That your partner isn’t going to care about the little things about your body that you’re insecure about and would think are a dealbreaker

  23. This. The guy I currently sleep with, showed me that my insecurities are so self-induced! I never liked my boobs, he absolutely loves them and always gives them extra attention. I always thought my hips were too wide, which makes me look fat. He holds onto my hips like his life depends on it. I always thought my face was ugly. He always leaves the lights on, so he can watch how I roll my eyes and scrunch my nose from pleasure. There are other things, that I always was self-conscious about. And he points out that he likes ✨ exactly those things✨ on my body.

  24. yes, the guy i had sex with looked like a model but meant nothing to me since it was a hook up only and we barely knew each other..

  25. My first time made me realize how purpose-built primary sexual organs are. I had this AHA-moment the first time i stuck it in. It felt just right, like putting on a perfectly fitting suit. Like, i was literally thinking to myself "Ohhh so that's why it's shaped like that!".

  26. I was surprised how natural the hip thrusting movement was. Before then I'd never really needed to move my body that way. But once I was in my hips were like 'I got this'.

  27. Actually I thought it would be much harder and was afraid I won’t be able to make it. Turns out it was maybe 10% as hard as I thought it would be

  28. I cannot possibly stress enough how much more seriously I would have taken PE and sports if I knew how much physical exertion sex took.

  29. There's more "clean up" than expected. All the movies whether they're showing hetero or homo sex, its always they fuck and then they cuddle or sleep or something other than cleaning up, and it's like??? That stuff leaks ya know? Spontaneous sex is tough for that reason alone.

  30. That when you ejaculated into a woman it came back out. I always assumed it was "absorbed" and to never be seen again. Was I wrong on that!

  31. My idiot cousin thought she "must be sterile" because "none of it stayed inside her." She also thought this sterility must have happened because of too many UTIs as a kid, so everything "down there" must be scarred and not work right anymore.

  32. That when men get hard… it really gets hard… I thought it would feel tender at most. Not like a rock wrapped in skin

  33. that especially if you have a vagina, you need to PEE AFTER! and make sure your partners hands are clean! penetration can cause bacteria to be pushed up into the urethra. peeing after helps flush it out and reduces the chances of getting a urinary tract infection (uti). uti’s are very painful and often require antibiotics to cure. i’ve had too many 2am hospital visits, painfully peeing little amounts of urine and blood every 5 minutes, because i didn’t pee after or waited too long to go. condoms and some other forms of birth control (like the pill) can also raise your chances of getting one. my best tip is to have something to drink before you do the deed, that way you have something in your system to pee out after.

  34. What an orgasm was or felt like. I thought the shaking my body went through was because I was really nervous, it wasn't until years later that realized that wasn't nerves, it was an orgasm.

  35. From porns I thought it took at least 30 min to get a girl to orgasm. And apparently I can only cum at maximum arousal. So it's not all about what you're doing to my dick.

  36. That my ADHD does extend to sex, I still get distracted and think of other random things, then there was this moment of "oh yeah I'm getting sucked off rn".

  37. My GF and I both have ADHD and we were getting into it, she had her hand down my pants, it was very intense, then she stops and says "before I forget, remind me to get tooth floss later" We had to stop to laugh for a few minutes.

  38. One time I was fucking my boyfriend who had ADHD and he was distracted, so I got upset and cried, thinking I was wasn’t pleasing him or something. He assured me that he was still aroused and into it, but was distracted thinking of the average length of cricket jumps, or something to that effect.

  39. The enjoyment of sex is so dependent on both people. I was horrible with one girlfriend, then I was better with a different girlfriend. There is some kind of connection that you cannot describe to anyone about how sex is so different with different people. Sex with my wife (before we were married) was off the charts. There was just something about us that was mind blowing. When we make love still to this day, the whole universe disappears, time is irrelevant, and nothing exist at that moment except her and I holding each other.

  40. The smell. Nobody talks about the sex smell. It’s a funky aroma of ass, sweat, vagina lube, and cum. All nice and commingled into what is known as sex smell. It also lingers. Febreeze helps, but doesn’t get rid of it completely. And the worst part is you can become nose blind to it quickly if you’re one of the participants, where as the non participants will walk into a wall of funky smells. Those in the know will recognize it quickly. Those not in the know will ask what that smell is, like walking on a teenager smoking weed and their parents who’ve never done drugs ask what that smell is.

  41. My friend said when her 10 year old child came into the bedroom after she and her husband finished having sex they asked if they just ate crab legs.

  42. Bruh, I was so fucking sheltered as a kid, I literally didn't even know pussies get wet. I thought it was just a hole you stick your dick in. My first time I asked my gf "were you nervous or something? Cuz your pussy was really sweaty." 😭 Wish I was joking. idk how I never thought about how painful it would be to fuck a dry, unlubricated hole.

  43. My friend went to some religious school where they didn't even teach sex ed. She found out you could get pregnant from unprotected sex by getting pregnant at 15.

  44. That it doesn't have to feel good or pleasant or something you'd ever want to repeat. My first time was kinda awful, obviously.

  45. As a girl I was told it would hurt to the point of tears. Like pain pain pain maximum pain. It was a little awkward, but no where near the level of pain where I needed to fear it.

  46. First time I had sex, we were spooning and she initiated. I was so confused about how my weiner was gonna reach all the way around her ass, taint, and into her coochie. I learnt something that day

  47. That losing your virginity doesn’t have to be painful and bloody. I was taught to expect that, but it wasn’t either of those things in my experience.

  48. I remember I told my first girlfriend to shower before I ate her out. Now, I'd go down on my wife after a sweaty workout. Interesting evolution.

  49. That if you've never had a pelvic exam, and you've gone your life with some unresolved sexual trauma, your vagina can just refuse to work. I tried countless times with someone I loved and trusted but it's like I had a brick wall down there. And pushing it just caused excrutiating pain, even when perfectly comfortable and lubed. It took a diagnosis of pelvic floor dysfunction, physical therapy, and a realization that I had underlying tension as an involuntary reaction from my nervous system. It went from expecting a one time deal, (as in one day I would be a virgin, the next I would not) to countless times pushing for a little bit more to actually fit in there lol. Don't even remember the first time it completely worked because the boyfriend and I had worked on so many exercises prior to just get my body to listen to my head

  50. a one night stand is not a satisfactory way to lose your virginity. it feels so much better with someone you actually have an emotional connection with and i regret not waiting for that

  51. My first few times was a Russian Roulette where half the bullets were Premature Ejaculation and the other half was Erectile Dysfunction.

  52. It didn’t hurt for me bc it wasn’t planned. Best way to go about it I think. But it was with someone I loved & trusted too

  53. When I was around 11, my 85 year old grandmother told me that in the 1930s, their way of trying to prevent pregnancy was to jump up and down right after sex…I had NO idea wtf she was talking about…until my adulthood and then it clicked lmao.

  54. I guess the way it felt, it felt nice and warm which I did not expect. Also it was lower than I thought, but not too low either.

  55. That women could be just as bad at sex. Genuinely believed the onus was all on the man. First time I got oral from a girl, I was lying there wondering why I could barely feel anything and it was because she barely put her mouth around and bobbed her head up and down mindlessly with minimum contact. Another time it was all teeth and slurp with no feeling. Then I met a girl who genuinely put the effort in and realised what I’d been missing all this time. Another time I had a girlfriend who was super enthusiastic about sex and she was dynamite in the sack, another girl just Lay there and it felt so awkward dull. I’m sure I was no stud either the first few times but I fully expected that. Never considered women needed practice too.

  56. This needs to be higher up. There is a lot of people commenting about how they just never orgasm. This is the answer. I hate how movies and shows made it look like the dude just slamming in a few times does the deal.

  57. That the first time is not something beautiful and special and everything they say it is. After it happened and now 20+ years later it just didn’t mean what I was told for years. It was with my first love and we loved each other but they make it seem like it’s a fairy tale.

  58. It's very silly and chill (for us at least). I feel like in the movies/porn people are always gasping for breath with this really intense look on their face. It always seemed so cringey to me, I couldn't imagine myself in that situation. Well it wasn't like that at all. We laugh and make jokes, talk about whatever comes to mind, sometimes fall asleep in the middle if it's been a long day. We even have inside jokes about sex - for some reason when we're making out and my husband starts to get turned on/intense he sometimes makes this weird sound that's almost a burp in the back of his throat. Whenever that happens I go, "Here's the cow!" because it almost sounds like a moo, and we both laugh. Long story short - very chill, very silly, very not embarrassing.

  59. This. It is not a competition, there are no leaderboards or anything like that, so there's no need to stress yourseld to be "good at sex". This mindset is toxic and ironically leads to bad sex.

  60. That a 1 night stand that turns into a fwb doesn't mean they love you. Lost my virginity & had my first kiss to a guy that kept me around for fun than threw me away like trash.

  61. How 'squishy' the skin of a vagina is. I always thought it would be firmer skin like that of a forearm or something. Nope. Squishy AF

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