What I’ve learned about my BPD

  1. I don’t follow how it attracts avoidant personality. BPD fear abandonment so avoidant personality will trigger this fear

  2. I’m not a doctor but I have an idea lol - The way I understood my own relationship to that kind of person was like, subconsciously, i thought it’d be some sort of proof of my value to have an unavailable person become available to me. But , you can’t win love, so I was playing to lose. Along the way I was reminded again and again that I wasn’t “lovable” because those unavailable people just aren’t open to love. It was torture, but it validated what I already believed about myself.

  3. For me these kind of relationships were the kind of love I knew, so I was attracted to them because that's what I was taught I deserve. I also had the feeling I could save someone, thus having a goal in my life. It was like a weight off my shoulders because I didn't really have to think about myself.

  4. It’s called repetition compulsion. It’s commonly understood in psychology and certainly not limited to BPD. The avoidant person will be motivated by their own repetition compulsion to seek out a BPD partner.

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Author: admin