For one there are no sharp objects in the movie dumpsters. I have to image IRL it would be like playing Russian roulette with rusty scrap metal and used needles.
Every time I toss something into our dumpster I imagine if I could survive a fall into whatever is in there. The consistent mix of glass, maggots, and rotting food never seems like a good fall option. I’d rather land on concrete honestly.
Suppressors got banned because of people whose only experience with guns comes from movies and video games, where "silencers" can turn a gunshot into an almost imperceptible pew noise. Suppressors in reality are the difference between "wow, that was pretty loud" and "mwap mwap mwap mwap EEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEE"
Every superhero movie where people pound on each other, throw each other into solid objects, fall, or otherwise get into ridiculous fights and all walk away without a bruise. And then there are the non superheroes who do the same thing.
I think this is based on age. When I was a teen/early twenties it was always fun in cars/outside/random places, but now that I am old and fat, sweating in the back seat of a car sounds miserable.
Related to this—threesomes. Albeit I've never been part of one, but I feel like movies make it seem much less complicated and awkward than it would actually be.
Honestly a lot of professions look cool on screen but have lots of boring or overwhelmingly stressful times. My firefighter friend told me he gets a lot of calls that end up being quite boring as he stand s around. A doctor told me that he says paperwork and beauurcracy make his job very grindy.
I am an epidemiologist and it is NOTHING like Kate Winslet in Contagion. Mostly sitting at a desk, crunching numbers, calling people and getting yelled at.
Being an attorney, especially a fresh-faced one. If it had to be portrayed the way it really is… Most of your job is not in court, it’s doing paperwork, but paperwork your clients’ lives depend on, so they’re upset when you don’t have a draft the next day after the issue comes up. Furthermore, neither law school nor the bar exam really teach you how to be an attorney, so you have to rely on your colleagues to help you answer questions, and essentially tell your clients “let me get back to you on that.”
Being rude to people. I wouldn't want to be rude in real life but in movies sometimes it looks fun and can be very cool in the context of a movie moment.
Absolutely. Whenever I watch an action movie with a team full of badass hero/anti heroes, I always wonder...Would I enjoy interacting with any of these people? I feel like Hughie from The Boys is actually a pretty good example of an actual normal person thrown into one of these settings.
The montages of learning a new skill. That shit ain't fun at first because with a lotta learning curves you gotta tolerate sucking at stuff for quite some time.
Well, i love learning new things, the not-so-well-made things that you do at first is what motivates me the most, i find it boring when I'm too good at something and have little too improve, so i move on onto something new
Training montages. It looks so cool and badass in the movies and they go from out of shape to shredded in 5 minutes max. Then you go to the gym and it’s boring as fuck and takes forever.
Yeah the real thing would be running some automated scripts and sitting around waiting them to finish, not having this fast-paced keyboard battle with someone on the other end.
Honestly, even college isn't nearly as fun as the movies make it look. Maybe the people making the movies were rich kids with easy majors (let's be real, that's exactly what it is), but most people aren't going to Cancun every spring break. You'll have maybe one big trip in four years, and mostly just go home on breaks. You aren't constantly going to wild parties, you'll go every now and then, but most nights you're, you know, studying.
Shower sex. Summer picnics. It’s HOT and there are always gnats, mosquitoes and sometimes the grass is itchy. I think dancing looks more fun in movies, as does karaoke. Really everything does
I knew a beef farmer that got blindsided by a bull from behind. It knocked his internal organs loose (still all connected, but slorping around inside). He said it was painful af and took like, two hours to agonizingly crawl to a phone.
LOL, the tough, wronged, apprehensive hero who picks up a 40 pounder of Jack and just chugs the whole thing and says "Let's do this shit" without so much as a stagger or urge to throw it up.
Early satiety PISSES me off. One minute I’m starving order food then boom, one bite in and I just can’t eat anymore because it feels gross even if it’s my favorite food
A fist fight longer than ten seconds. Action heroes beating seven shades of shite out of each other looks cool, in reality both would have broken hands from so many head punches.
Believe it or not my grandfather did this in Chosin reservoir (Korean war) with his bayonet. He was shot in the waist. (Tbf he did end up getting medical treatment when he was eventually taken to a hospital). He was such a badass.
You know, people say that, meanwhile my niece is having the time of her life and loving highschool while I'm sitting here wondering what I missed out on as a homeschooler.
I’m gonna say smoking. I’ve never smoked in real life cuz I know how bad for you it is, gross smoke smell, etc. but they make it look so hot in movies, I don’t understand it
They make it look cool and tough but actually smokers are much weaker, slower and get out of breath much easier (I am a former smoker). I am 55 and I bet I could kick my 40 year old ass if I could go back in time. Smokers are a joke.
I took the best vacation I've ever been on in 2020. We set up the pop-up camper in the yard and just camped for a whole week. All cooking and meals were had outside, we had a fire pit and everything, but the best part:
I meant more like the duels and saloon shoot-outs look fun in movies but probably sucked hard in real life. But you have brought up a good point...cowboy toilets were just a bucket maybe? Not sure if they had prime plumbing
I’ve noticed that many paintball scenes don’t show the stars wearing a full face shield, only goggles, so you can see their face. Imagine getting shot in the mouth or nose with paintballs.
When I was in elementary school, I used to pretend I was in high school. It made elementary school more fun. In high school, I pretended I was in college. In college, I was in my pjs on the couch because I got my degree at home, so I pretended I was a college student in pjs on the couch and it was awesome.
Flying via airports and aircrafts. Have they met TSA/Security and in-flight co-passengers? The shit up in the air is really shitty! Also, the food sucks, space sucks, everyone is anxious and not enjoying the +3 hours lead time before and after the flight time. Magically, there are no worries about the luggage? Ever heard of crappy luggage collection belts?
Killing someone. You don’t see the hero of a film going home, worrying about if they did the right thing, opening a bottle of wine and having a bit of a cry. Thinking of the family who lost a father, brother, son. Just to numb the memory of seeing the henchman dying in his dreams for the hundredth time. The light leaving his eyes as he cried out for his mother in the final throws of life. You don’t see that.
Being the amazing girl/guy who is into the bad boy/girl. In real life, even if it works out and they magically change (spoiler - they don’t lol), the resentment and damage done to the first partner is usually high enough for it to poison the waters of the relationship beyond recovery.
Fair. Addiction sucks balls. But there's no way a film can convey what a shot of morphine feels like. Not tried Heroin, but had IV morphine when I was in hospital and if it's like that but better, then fuck me I can see why people fall for it.
Fishing. It looks nice and relaxing. Good convos, a beer or three. Until I go and get my line stuck in a tree first cast then proceed to catch nothing and be bored to shreds the whole time.
Trying on large amounts of clothes.
Yes! I hate trying on any clothes. I’d rather just eyeball it, look at the price tag and decide I don’t need it after all.
Have you considered montaging your way through it?
It has no right to be as exhausting as it is!
Jumping from a building into a dumpster.
Also, jumping from a moving vehicle.
For one there are no sharp objects in the movie dumpsters. I have to image IRL it would be like playing Russian roulette with rusty scrap metal and used needles.
Every time I toss something into our dumpster I imagine if I could survive a fall into whatever is in there. The consistent mix of glass, maggots, and rotting food never seems like a good fall option. I’d rather land on concrete honestly.
Garbage is never soft.
Parkour!
I'll say jumping in general.
Aim for the bushes!
Aim for the bushes
Stakeouts must be boring af. Sitting for hours…no bathroom… can’t stretch your legs… probably doordashing to the stakeout van is frowned upon…
Depends what you're staking out. Someone once stole my cat. A cat I'd had for 3 years, who got me through some incredibly dark times.
Stake me out tonight, I don't wanna let you go til we catch this guy!
And you don't even end up capturing a noteworthy criminal
I'm already bored after they are waiting for over 2 minutes in movies. In real life that could take days or more!
Shooting a gun without ear protection
Mawp
WHAT?
Suppressors got banned because of people whose only experience with guns comes from movies and video games, where "silencers" can turn a gunshot into an almost imperceptible pew noise. Suppressors in reality are the difference between "wow, that was pretty loud" and "mwap mwap mwap mwap EEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEE"
cries in tinnitus
Robbing casinos.
How is this not fun?
or banks for that matter. I get so hyped when I watch the movies but irl I'd probably be indiscreetly terrified.
Fighting
Or even worse fighting the next day or a few hours after already having a tough fight.
Every superhero movie where people pound on each other, throw each other into solid objects, fall, or otherwise get into ridiculous fights and all walk away without a bruise. And then there are the non superheroes who do the same thing.
A few movies get it right. There's some movie where the guy punches someone and immediately recoils because it broke his fucking hand.
Having the entire fate of the world on your shoulders
I hate when that happens
Shut up and get in the robot.
Sex in uncomfortable places
What, like the back of a Volkswagen?
Like up the bum?
Shower sex. Movies make it seem glamorous, easy, and sensual. Tried it and I fuckin slipped half way through.
I think this is based on age. When I was a teen/early twenties it was always fun in cars/outside/random places, but now that I am old and fat, sweating in the back seat of a car sounds miserable.
Related to this—threesomes. Albeit I've never been part of one, but I feel like movies make it seem much less complicated and awkward than it would actually be.
Sex in the water at the beach is much harder than you’d think from watching movies.
Honestly a lot of professions look cool on screen but have lots of boring or overwhelmingly stressful times. My firefighter friend told me he gets a lot of calls that end up being quite boring as he stand s around. A doctor told me that he says paperwork and beauurcracy make his job very grindy.
I am an epidemiologist and it is NOTHING like Kate Winslet in Contagion. Mostly sitting at a desk, crunching numbers, calling people and getting yelled at.
I'm related to an ER doctor. He says a lot of shifts are a parade of argumentative Covid patients.
Being an attorney, especially a fresh-faced one. If it had to be portrayed the way it really is… Most of your job is not in court, it’s doing paperwork, but paperwork your clients’ lives depend on, so they’re upset when you don’t have a draft the next day after the issue comes up. Furthermore, neither law school nor the bar exam really teach you how to be an attorney, so you have to rely on your colleagues to help you answer questions, and essentially tell your clients “let me get back to you on that.”
Swinging like spider man. Looks awesome until you realize your insides are not made for rapid acceleration and free fall
Spiderman would be mainlining Zofran for the nausea.
Being rude to people. I wouldn't want to be rude in real life but in movies sometimes it looks fun and can be very cool in the context of a movie moment.
It's funny, I think I would hate Tony Stark and Jim Halpert in real life, but I love to watch them.
Absolutely. Whenever I watch an action movie with a team full of badass hero/anti heroes, I always wonder...Would I enjoy interacting with any of these people? I feel like Hughie from The Boys is actually a pretty good example of an actual normal person thrown into one of these settings.
Like, in sitcoms and a lot of movies everyone is always snarking on each other, being sarcastic, and making rude remarks.
Running a food truck
Try walking a food truck.
You should watch the Brooklyn 99 episodes where Charles has a foodtruck
The montages of learning a new skill. That shit ain't fun at first because with a lotta learning curves you gotta tolerate sucking at stuff for quite some time.
Well, i love learning new things, the not-so-well-made things that you do at first is what motivates me the most, i find it boring when I'm too good at something and have little too improve, so i move on onto something new
Cowboy shit
What do they eat that makes it different to regular human shit?
Am cowboy, can confirm, it's not fun but it's life
Training montages. It looks so cool and badass in the movies and they go from out of shape to shredded in 5 minutes max. Then you go to the gym and it’s boring as fuck and takes forever.
Basically anything in a montage. There is a reason why its put in a montage; to pimp up the activity
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it's so scary in real life.
idk about you, but I never watch a movie where people are getting shot/punched/stabbed and think "wow that looks so fun"
Hacking.
Yeah the real thing would be running some automated scripts and sitting around waiting them to finish, not having this fast-paced keyboard battle with someone on the other end.
mashes random keys
What about slashing?
Adulthood
Sex on a beach.
Haha oh yea you don’t realize how terrible sand can be until you try for yourself 😂. Been there. Never again.
Doing anything on the beach is just like doing it normally, but slightly worse
Roddy Doyle, The Commitments: "There's nothing romantic about getting sand in your knob. "
Been there and it sucks. I even brought a little blanket but sand gets everywhere and my knees were being sanded down with every thrust.
First reasonable answer. Seriously.
High school
Honestly, even college isn't nearly as fun as the movies make it look. Maybe the people making the movies were rich kids with easy majors (let's be real, that's exactly what it is), but most people aren't going to Cancun every spring break. You'll have maybe one big trip in four years, and mostly just go home on breaks. You aren't constantly going to wild parties, you'll go every now and then, but most nights you're, you know, studying.
Depends on the person. I had plenty of fun
I've worked for a Parks & Recreation Dept. and also attended community college. Neither were as fun as their TV shows suggested.
Driving high speeds in traffic while getting shot at, like Bond.
Jumping / smashing through a window
Shower sex. Summer picnics. It’s HOT and there are always gnats, mosquitoes and sometimes the grass is itchy. I think dancing looks more fun in movies, as does karaoke. Really everything does
Went on a picnic with my family in the summer once in a field of flowers.
Ninja Turtles
True... Imagine human sized, armored reptiles capable of hand to hand and melee weapon fighting!
Getting tossed by a bull. JACKASS JOHNNY KNOXVILLE
I knew a beef farmer that got blindsided by a bull from behind. It knocked his internal organs loose (still all connected, but slorping around inside). He said it was painful af and took like, two hours to agonizingly crawl to a phone.
Getting shot in the shoulder. In the movies it seems like it stings for a few minutes then it’s nbd. Fun!
Drinking an entire bottle of alcohol.
… and waking up with a two minute hangover, while still never feeling the urge to pee.
LOL, the tough, wronged, apprehensive hero who picks up a 40 pounder of Jack and just chugs the whole thing and says "Let's do this shit" without so much as a stagger or urge to throw it up.
Parties (most of them)
Lying in a field of flowers
Also stargazing in the grass. It’s cold and I can’t tell if that’s just the grass or if things are crawling on me.
Try telling the truth in a field of flowers.
My god the bees and other bugs would be horrible
Eating one bite of food at a fancy restaurant and asking for the bill.
The restaurants you're visiting aren't fancy enough.
Early satiety PISSES me off. One minute I’m starving order food then boom, one bite in and I just can’t eat anymore because it feels gross even if it’s my favorite food
A fist fight longer than ten seconds. Action heroes beating seven shades of shite out of each other looks cool, in reality both would have broken hands from so many head punches.
Getting shot at.
Even if you don’t get an infection, the recovery pain is the worse
Believe it or not my grandfather did this in Chosin reservoir (Korean war) with his bayonet. He was shot in the waist. (Tbf he did end up getting medical treatment when he was eventually taken to a hospital). He was such a badass.
Bouncing off chain link fences. You don’t bounce. You just crash into them.
Climbing them is also a challenge, to say the least
House hunting.
Yes, they don’t even move, no sport in it.
I actually liked that. Looking at property is interesting, and you can imagine all the potential.
Being a child soldier.
I once overheard a little boy wishing that he lived in Africa because "they let kids be in the Army and I really want to be in the Army!"
What movie makes it look fun
Definitely high school.
The only thing I miss about High School was not having to pay rent or bills.
You know, people say that, meanwhile my niece is having the time of her life and loving highschool while I'm sitting here wondering what I missed out on as a homeschooler.
Walking away from an explosion.
Try walking towards an explosion then.
Don’t you dare badmouth Star Wars. That was all accurate.
Shooting guns indoors. Like the scene in inception where they are all capping off in the hotel hallway. You wouldn’t hear anything for a week
Shower sex
Shower foreplay is great, shower sex is terrible
Came here to say this.
The trick is to have a shower head that can be angled out of the way, and bring lube. The way that it's done in movies? Hard pass.
I’m gonna say smoking. I’ve never smoked in real life cuz I know how bad for you it is, gross smoke smell, etc. but they make it look so hot in movies, I don’t understand it
They make it look cool and tough but actually smokers are much weaker, slower and get out of breath much easier (I am a former smoker). I am 55 and I bet I could kick my 40 year old ass if I could go back in time. Smokers are a joke.
Clubbing. 90% of the time it sucks.
Family day trips/vacations
just got back from family vacation, and actually cacjled reading this. So true! I needed a vacation from my vacation.
Vacations are just keeping your kid alive in a new location, where nothing is childproofed and there are no routines.
National Lampoon vacations were the closest to reality.
I took the best vacation I've ever been on in 2020. We set up the pop-up camper in the yard and just camped for a whole week. All cooking and meals were had outside, we had a fire pit and everything, but the best part:
I meant more like the duels and saloon shoot-outs look fun in movies but probably sucked hard in real life. But you have brought up a good point...cowboy toilets were just a bucket maybe? Not sure if they had prime plumbing
The psych ward
Shower sex is sorta over rated tbh
Paintball. That scene in 10 things I hate about you sure had a lot less middle aged men with semiautomatic weapons.
Also, they didn't show them cussing a blue streak while trying to get the paint out of their hair.
I’ve noticed that many paintball scenes don’t show the stars wearing a full face shield, only goggles, so you can see their face. Imagine getting shot in the mouth or nose with paintballs.
Killing people
I love playing the dark brotherhood questline in Skyrim, but the idea of actually harming another human intentionally makes me sick to my stomach.
High school
When I was in elementary school, I used to pretend I was in high school. It made elementary school more fun. In high school, I pretended I was in college. In college, I was in my pjs on the couch because I got my degree at home, so I pretended I was a college student in pjs on the couch and it was awesome.
-Having a irresponsible "fun" parent
Relationships
Pillow fights
High intensity office jobs. They look sexy and powerful in movies, IRL sustaining that shit sucks ass and you go home tired
Kissing first thing in the morning after waking up before brushing your teeth
That’s why we have bedside mints
After school detention.
Traveling long distances
I enjoy long road trips, provided I'm in a decently enjoyable vehicle. Especially if I'm driving through somewhere new.
Flying via airports and aircrafts. Have they met TSA/Security and in-flight co-passengers? The shit up in the air is really shitty! Also, the food sucks, space sucks, everyone is anxious and not enjoying the +3 hours lead time before and after the flight time. Magically, there are no worries about the luggage? Ever heard of crappy luggage collection belts?
Imagine watching a hit man movie and Agent 76 is just stuck at immigration for 4 hours
Sex on a beach
Having scissor hands
Can confirm. Really wanted scissor hands as a kid, even though the movie also kinda showed how terrible it was.
Minor complaint but this is starting to feel a little bit too
Wild sex. I don't have the energy for that. Let's just both get our rocks off, clean up, have a snack and go to bed.
Also sex anywhere that isn't at house and where you can't clean up properly after.
War
Most war movies don't look fun
War never changes.
Killing someone. You don’t see the hero of a film going home, worrying about if they did the right thing, opening a bottle of wine and having a bit of a cry. Thinking of the family who lost a father, brother, son. Just to numb the memory of seeing the henchman dying in his dreams for the hundredth time. The light leaving his eyes as he cried out for his mother in the final throws of life. You don’t see that.
Fraternity hazing
Being the amazing girl/guy who is into the bad boy/girl. In real life, even if it works out and they magically change (spoiler - they don’t lol), the resentment and damage done to the first partner is usually high enough for it to poison the waters of the relationship beyond recovery.
Treating someone as a project, not a partner, is just not the way. Either accept the badness or find someone compatible.
Heroin
Fair. Addiction sucks balls. But there's no way a film can convey what a shot of morphine feels like. Not tried Heroin, but had IV morphine when I was in hospital and if it's like that but better, then fuck me I can see why people fall for it.
Shower sex
Having an adventure of any kind that requires you to sleep on the ground. I would wake up and not be able to turn my head to the left.
Dating.
College (you actually have to study)
Being a criminal.
Life
War.
sexual harassment towards men
Boarding schools.
Shootouts where you never get hurt & high speed chases
Being in a movie
Turning your indoor staircase into a water slide.
Well, tonight's plan is canceled.
New York
Grenades xD
They're pretty fun if you remember to duck
Strip clubs, they're not all that they're cracked up to be
Cooking with the family. It quickly turns into a petty argument and ungodly mess that no one cleans up.
Living
war
What is it good for?
Alien invasion
Cleaning up. Spoonful of Sugar my ass.
Food fights. Can you imagine the clean up?!
Having a baby
kissing someone while they are mad to make them shut up
Drinking
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Drinking to excess. It always looks fun but when I do it I just dance to 90s rap and pass out.
Staying up all day and night. I don't know how tf they do it.
Work
Fishing. It looks nice and relaxing. Good convos, a beer or three. Until I go and get my line stuck in a tree first cast then proceed to catch nothing and be bored to shreds the whole time.
Sex. In general